Let's Just All Prevail

It's my personal belief that people telling you that they're disappointed in you is unfair. As a teenager with above average intelligence and a lack of ambition, I'm given the "wasted potential" speech about once a week. For those that don't know what I'm talking about, the "wasted potential" speech is the one given by people (usually parents) to their children who seem to be, in a nutshell, failing at living. It's the "you have so much potential, but you're doing nothing with the gifts God has given to you... you're so smart and I just hate to see you going nowhere in life." I know a lot of teenagers can relate to my feelings about this speech. Not only has it become second nature to actually mouth the words coming from our parents while they're giving us this speech, but it's repetitive, incessant nature of reappearing but never actually solving anything or helping anyone at all makes it that one thing in my week that I truly dread.

Today was an all time low as it relates to the "wasted potential" speech. I got it from a friend. An extremely talented friend that is also wasting his potential, though I would never put those thoughts in words and actually express them to him. On the one hand, people telling you what a failure you are and how disappointed they are in you is actually a confidence boost. I guess this is because it just reinforces the fact that there is someone out there that believes in you. It makes us feel good to know that there is someone, even if it's only one, out there that thinks we have the potential for greateness, even if our talents and intelligence are being undermined by the fact that we have a simple lack of motivation. On the other hand, people giving us this speech just reminds us that we're doing nothing with our lives and that all of the positive attributes we possess should probably have been given to someone who will put them to good use; honing in on the things that they're great at and enabling themselves to make something of their lives.

But I guess that brings me to another point all-together. Who's to say that the potential we're wasting now won't be exhibited later in life? If cliche is correct and it will really never be too late, then why does it matter if we're wasting potential now, and what does that have to do with those people that insist on constantly pointing out other's lack of motivation? Obviously, the ideal situation would be to use the skills you possess, whether that be intelligence, abilities in music, or even the potential to dress yourself well; however, most people take a while to "figure themselves out", and it isn't like your potential will just go away. Personally, I don't believe that potential has an expiration date. I think that if you're intelligent, you'll always have a capacity to understand more than the average person, and if you have a talent for something specific like a sport or instrument, though you may lose some ability that will have to be regained, people will never actually lose their potential.

When considering things like this, I like to also remind myself of the other side to this debate; the side that says potential should be honed in on and put to good use, which honestly (as much as I don't like it) makes complete sense. If it weren't for people that motivated themselves to greatness, the lives of millions of people would be drastically altered. I mean, just think about it. What if Edison lacked motivation... would we still be sitting in the dark when the sun went down and our candles burned out? And what about all of the life-saving medicine that has been created in the modern day? Had it not been for determined people and a desire for something new, maybe we'd all still be dying of the flu or suffering the effects of primitive practices of medicine. Now, don't get me wrong. I'm realistic, so I don't think that everyone has the potential to be a Thomas Edison or Dr. Martin Luther King, but maybe if everyone lived up to a higher standard, we could all be great in our own right. And not to contradict myself, but who's to say that potential like that is only given to a select few? Maybe we all have the potential for greatness, but it's just easier for some of us to find out what we're great at. Those are the lucky ones, I guess.

Going back to my earlier point about it not being fair for people to say they're disappointed, while that has a lot to do with wasted potential, I think it has more to do with self judgment. Personally, when I do something wrong or not to the best of my ability, I'm a harsher critic of myself than anyone else will ever be. I think it's like this for a lot of people, and that we ourselves can sometimes even be too harsh. For me, when I know I've done something wrong and I'm disappointed in myself, I'm not a fun person to be around; i get angry, irritable, and hard to talk to, much less understand. Does this mean, then, that we should all give up our angry judgments of ouselves because they are too critical? Or does it simply mean that we know we can achieve something greater, and to settle for less would be selling ourselves short? I think it's different from person to person, but I think everyone would benefit from knowing that even when you fail (even if it seems world-ending at the time) that the Earth still rotates, night will still come, and the people that truly love you will always be there... and who knows, maybe if you're lucky, they'll have a wasted potential speech ready and waiting for you. :)